FRAGMENTS
What's your main goal with modeling?
RM: I’d like to inspire someone - anyone! I always thought fashion was for influential people, like designers, celebrities, professional models, etc. and in order to be a part of that world you had to BE someone. Diversity and representation is important in the fashion industry (for everyone) because historically it hasn’t and still doesn’t embrace people of color or anyone who doesn’t fit into a certain beauty “standard.” My hope is that when people look at my Instagram or my blog they’re able to connect with me on a human level, which is the most important thing - enjoying my pictures is just a plus!
What advice would you give to someone else who wants to start modeling but they're not quite sure how to begin?
RM: JUST START. I literally spent years procrastinating - years! I was so worried about what other people would think and if they’d even like my content. At some point I realized the only thing holding me back was ME. This goes for anyone, and not specifically about modeling, but if you want to do something… do it. Put your heart, positive energy, and creativity into whatever interests you. Don’t let other people discourage your or talk you out of pursuing your dreams. Rejection is a part of life; no one is immune to scrutiny and not everyone is going to be supportive of your endeavors, but what other people think is irrelevant. When you do things for yourself, that’s when the magic happens! Stay true to yourself and the rest will fall into place.
While this industry can be extremely brutal to our self-esteem, personally, shooting with people of all backgrounds & features, it constantly reminds me that we all have our own insecurities whether other people can see them or not. How do you keep it from negatively affecting your mental health?
RM: It’s incredibly hard to not compare yourself to other people, but like you said everyone is different, so that’s important to keep in mind. Also, the things that make you different are special and something to be treasured. I didn’t realized that until I was older. One of my favorite quotes is by Oscar Wilde, and he really said it best: “Ordinary riches can be stolen; real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you.” As we know, social media has a way of portraying life as always being perfect - a highlight reel, but it’s just an illusion. I’ll be scrolling through Instagram thinking “this person has a house, this person just got engaged, this person has an amazing job!” etc. All of those things may be true, but other people’s success and blessings are specific to them, as are mine. We’re all on a different journey and timeline, so comparing yourself to others only does more harm that good. I have to remind myself that even though I’m not living the same life as someone else, that doesn’t mean I don’t have a great life. I do, and I need to appreciate every moment of it. A few years ago, long before launching my blog, I took a 2 year break from Facebook and Instagram. I just wasn’t interested in being online, so sometimes unplugging for a while is necessary. Also, therapy is a really great outlet and has been incredibly beneficial for me. I went into it with an open mind but not really knowing what to expect. My goal is to be a more evolved version of myself and someone I’M proud of. Our mental health is equally important as our physical and emotional well-being, so it’s really important to listen to yourself, how you feel, and not neglect things even if it’s uncomfortable or hard to deal with.
Q+A | CHATS WITH CATH
I followed Catherine Conner (@cathalyse) a few months ago on Instagram and was sooo excited when she followed me back, because I really admire her work. She captures people and energy effortlessly and beautifully. I’m thankful to have snagged a spot with her before the end of the year because she’s so busy! Catherine came up with the idea to do a Q+A style blog post, which I’ve never done before!
During our shoot we were chatting about life, social media, and mental health. I named this blog post “Fragments” because we were surrounded by mosaic glass. On a more personal level, we all have so many different parts to ourselves - interesting and beautiful when pieced together, but sometimes we don’t always feel complete.
How did you get into modeling and how long have you been doing it?
RM: A little backstory… when I was 16 my mom enrolled me in this local Modeling Academy to help me build my confidence and self-esteem. I didn’t get any jobs after completing the class, haha, but it was still something I wanted to do, I just didn’t know how. It wasn’t until I joined Instagram in 2011 that I was introduced to the blogging world. I was so inspired by the women (and men) who were “regular” people with no modeling experience documenting their everyday outfits. After years of procrastinating I finally started my blog in January 2018, so I’ve been on this journey for about 2 years! Even though I spend a bit of time in front of the camera I don’t identify as or consider myself a model. When I think of models I think of Naomi Campbell, Tyra Banks, Christy Turlington, and Linda Evangelista, you know? The women who were the “it girls” of the 90s. I’m just over here, like, “this is what I’m doing and I’m really enjoying it! Wanna get tacos later?” So, yes… technically I am “modeling” and I suppose that’s the only way to describe it, but for me it’s really just about feeling inspired, connecting with other people, and having the ability to express myself through my blog. You can’t tell from my pictures, but I’m quite goofy in real life, so that’s how I’ll always view myself.
People tend to think of modeling as superficial and especially in the age of social media, it can seem like we only create images to post on Instagram. However, during our shoot, you mentioned modeling is a form of escapism for you. I'd love to hear more about that.
RM: I’m right-brain dominant so I’ve always been a creative person, dreamed lofty dreams, and appreciated the abstract/fantasy part of life. Modeling is a form of escapism for me because when I have a shoot I’m not worrying about anything else. It’s this happy, creative, undisturbed bubble of time where I’m not stressing about work, bills, what I need from the grocery store, or why a guy hasn’t texted me back, haha. I’m just focusing on posing, expressing, and bringing something to life. After a shoot I’m always so excited to get the pictures back because it’s the first time I’m seeing what the photographer saw, you know? It’s a magical thing. As for social media, Instagram has the ability to open our world up to things we’ve never thought about or seen before (a squid escaping from a jar while underwater? Liiike… #shook) and be a place of inspiration, but it can also be a place of toxicity. I used to be so fixated on analyzing posting times and trying to crack the ever-changing, always infuriating Instagram Algorithm. This is embarrassing to admit, but I’ve actually woken up at 2 AM to post a picture. Yikes! It just goes to show how much influence social media can have over your life, but only if you let it. There’s always going to be pressure to keep content interesting, which isn’t always easy, but when I share something it’s because I’m really happy with what I’m putting out there. The creative process can’t be forced, you know? Sometimes not having 100 ideas swirling around or shoots lined up is for the best, because it gives you time to reset. I find that inspiration is a lot like love. It always finds you when you aren’t looking for it.
If you could tell your younger self one thing, what would it be?
RM: I have a few things…
Trust the process
Trust your intuition
Stay true to yourself
Keep your heart open
Everything is temporary
I’ve learned that things aren’t always going to go exactly how I planned… and that’s OK, because something better is usually on its way. I’ve learned to accept advice from others but to always listen to my intuition (it never leads me astray). I’ve learned to stand up for myself and be strong in my convictions. I’ve learned to protect my heart, but not close it off entirely. I’ve learned that sadness, doubt, and uncertainty are a part of life, but so is rising above, staying on track despite obstacles, and that circumstances are always changing ♥
